4:25 p.m. - 2005-07-13
Crazy canadian bitches
Hello Guv'nas

Well i will have to apologise from the start for the lack of illustrations in this particluar entry. Using net cafe's is not the best when trying to import photos and the like, but im working on it.

Well, arrived in the merry old city of London on monday. As you can imagine its still very much on the edge since the bombing attacks. Its on everyones lips and there isnt and hour that goes by without some new revelation on the news.

The first few hours was pretty daunting here. A city of 10 million people can make you feel a little small. The first person i met was a lovely canadian girl named Sarah-mae. Something about hyphenated names thats fucked up. She took offense the moment i forgot to add the "Mae" to the end of her name and from that moment on she had it in for me. We were staying in a 4 bed dorm in a hostel in Kings Cross. About two hours after meeting her she was screaming at me in the dorm for "stealing her cigarettes". She tried in vain to get me kicked out of the hostel but in the end she just changed rooms. Now she goes around telling everyone that i am a thief and shouldnt be trusted. Its hilarious.

The next guy that moved into my dorm said to me that he had been warned about me and to be careful about his stuff. He said the joke was on me because the only thing of value that he had was his " union jack underpants" I told him that the next time he comes back into the room i will be sitting on his bunk bed smoking a joint made out of his underpants. He subsequently went and bought a larger padlock for his locker. Nobody in this city can take a joke... Crazy frigging people.

Last night i was kind of bored and a little lonely so i went to the bar downstairs and entered the pool competition. I came third, which is amazing because really i am pretty shite at pool (i guess its like all sports..the poms are useless).

This new guy moved into the dorm last night. Absolute top bloke. He is from argentina and his name is Ignacia. I wont even try to say his second name, its one of those where you just about choke to death on your own drool trying to roll your tongue on the 'Rrrrrrrrrrrr'. Hung out with him today for a bit and went walking to Camden. Its a fair walk but was alot of fun. They have this all week long market which sells everything and at pretty reasonable prices.

I went to a vodafone shop to ask where i can get my mobile unlocked (it's currently locked to the hun network) The guy there told me that there was a 'crackdown' on people who unlock phones as it is supposedly illegal. he told me to go see a guy at this market and ask him. I walked up to this stall where a jamaican dude was selling everything from underpants to screwdrivers and asked
" Excuse me do you unlock phones?" In a loud voice, so all the market could heare he said " No, i dont unlock phones, thats not my buisness". I apologised and as i was about to walk away he gestured me to come back. Then he spoke really softly and told me to come to the back of his shop where he could unlock my phone for 7 pounds. It was pretty funny. I almost felt like i was a criminal...." meet me in the alley in 10 minutes....come alone...bring seven dollars in unmarked bills".

Lesson for this entry: Dont trust canadians or people with stupid Hyphenated names like bitch-face Mclesbian.

Hey guys, leave me a message will you. Just to let me know your reading my page!

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